Birthday Hobbit Style

I love birthdays! They are so fun and really my favorite. I love to celebrate my people. I love to make them feel like they are the specialist person on the planet...because, lets be honest...to me, they are! February we have two, at the beginning of the month is Ada and the end is Chris! So its like a month of fun.

My person! What a special day to celebrate the man who gives it all. He's the best! He works endlessly for us and always comes home to our crazy house with a smile and laugh. He's our protector, provider, leader and friend. I really don't know how I'd get through life without him! He seriously deserves so much more than I could ever give him, but we made sure he felt extra special on his day. He's a reader, he reads a lot! One of his favorite authors...or maybe THE favorite is J.R.R. Tolkien. The kids and I decided use Tolkien's hobbits and make Chris' day a hobbit day! So fun! We made hobbit feet, a hobbit hole cake, and made sure Daddy had a special meal for each of the hobbit meals throughout the day. It was a seriously fun day and we hope he knows just how happy we are to have him! Happy Birthday, My Love! Safe to say this will be tradition!

Lean into Grace

I've been down and out and find way too often that I'm beating myself up. Ever notice you really can be your own worst critic?? Well, I find that to be quite true here lately. I feel out of sorts...spiritually, physically, and emotionally. I really hate that I've put back on weight, I don't like the lack of "God time" I have these days, relationships that used to be easy, feel awkward and strained, and I'm just kind of floundering. I spent my 30th year making health and fitness a priority and that journey restored many areas of my life...spiritually, physically and emotionally. I was really able to prove a lot to myself. Then, last year we grew a baby, moved into a new house and spent most of the time trying to keep up. It was an amazing time, but crazy at times! And now, here we are. I'm a little discouraged because so much feels out of sorts. I really was in a place I loved, if not the best I've every been and now I feel far from it. Everything hurts, I can't do physically half of what I was doing a year ago and so much just feels off center! Ha!

Often I find myself trying to remind me of what my body has done. Yes, it looks and feels different than it did a year ago, but really! I've grown four tiny people from scratch! Inside me! And then went through the process of birthing them! It's truly amazing. I couldn't be more grateful for what my body has done, with God's help. Yet, there are times when the bad vibes still creep in and somewhat taunt me. When I see my reflection, I get upset. Mad that I have to start all over, mad that I can't do what I could a year ago. Just mad, discouraged and defeated. In the face of that, I'm trying my best to dig reeeallllly deep and find some grace. I was reminded by my beautiful life long friend that grace is necessary right now, as always but definitely now! Grace because I'm still sort of in a recovery phase. (and call me crazy but recovery after having girls seems like a longer process than when I had my boys...). Grace because I'm in the middle of a very demanding time of parenting. Grace because I'm just now in the last week starting to sleep more after a year of not nearly enough! Grace because no matter how many times we have to start over or we fall, God's there, stretching out His mighty hand and offering us more grace that we every thought possible! My spiritual life, sadly, has taken a hit over the last few months, too. All of this I know will improve and with time I will get back to where I was.

And for now, while this process is in progress, I'm going to start focusing on grace. Grace from myself for myself and focusing on the grace so graciously given to me by God. He doesn't care what we look like or how often we fall, only that we try. He's so forgiving when I've failed to put Him on top. And thankfully, now that things are beginning to get "normal" again, I can begin the process of re-prioritizing and rebuilding. And I think, with God's amazing grace, I may just come out even better than I was a year ago. I will physically and spiritually restore, relationships will work themselves out and things will slowly come back together! And as my husband (a man who has so much more grace and encouragement for me than I deserve!) reminds me daily....enjoy the journey, learn from the process and appreciate the progress...small and big! And that! That is what I'm hoping for as I rebuild...joy, appreciation, grace and progress! I'm gonna try my best to get there with patience....and a whole lot of grace. Lean into God's grace with me, it's there in abundance, we need only to accept.

My Valentines

My tribe! I love them so deep and they love me the same. Man! What would I do without them?!

We celebrated with our traditional family meal by candle light. We enjoyed brownies made by the middle kiddos and food prepared by mommy. It was a fun evening loving on our favorites. 

My wonderful man and I found each other 17 years ago and what a privilege it has been to love him, and oh how well he loves me! We've been with each other every step of the way...watched each other finish high school, graduate college, start careers, almost 12 years of marriage, 3 houses, 7 cars, 2 boys, 2 girls, 1 angel and whole lot of hard, good, strong love! We've held hands, walked our walk and held each other up every minute of this journey, big and little moments. We've walked each other through challenges and victories. Seriously, I love him so so much! Everyday more than the last. And just when you think you've topped out, there's more! More love! More love, more appreciation, and adoration.  I love him and this crazy, messy, chaotic, beautiful life we live. He and our children are truly all I need. My loves, my forever Valentines.

Sweet baby Valentine <3

An American Girl Birthday

My sweet oldest girl turned 7 (SEVEN!) this month! She chose a special trip over a party, they get a choice each year. We honestly enjoy the trips, we definitely love experiences over "stuff" and the kids really seem to be enjoying it as well. The boys have already picked out their trip spots for their birthdays this year!

Ada really wanted to visit the American Girl Store for her birthday, so we made it a girls trip, because obviously the boys may not have the same appreciation for that kind of trip! ;) She has mommy's american girl from when she was young, Molly, but she really wanted to pick out her own so she chose Kit. It was a very fun day! We got Kit, she spent her birthday money to get her desk and we ate at the cafe. The dolls got their ears pierced and their hair fixed while we shopped. It was a fun day!

I honestly can't believe my tiny baby girl is now a big seven year old. She has added so much to our lives! She's taught us about all things sparkly and princess. She's kind and beautiful. She's a wonderful sister and friend. She's still sticking with being a doctor when she grows up and she's a dedicated gymnast. She is thrilled with the opportunity to try new things this year! She will learn piano and take ballet or art lessons, she hasn't decided yet! :) It is an honor to be her mom! She makes us so proud. I had no idea what was in store seven years ago when she entered this world. Having a girl seemed scary to me, but I'm so glad The Lord knew better and gave me the opportunity to mother this amazing little girl! Happy Birthday, Little Miss Magic! Keep shining your light and I hope this year is even more awesome than the last! We love you, oh so much!!

Making Us Proud

Our children are amazing! Yes, we are their parents so we may be a tiny bit biased, but y'all! They rock! They are continuing to do wonderful things with their gifts and talents and it's so wonderful to watch! They do wonderful things in our home, too. Growing spiritually, doing their school work responsibly and loving one another, but sometimes I just have to take a minute to acknowledge their hard work in other areas of their life, also.

Grayson accepted a pretty big responsibility of the lead role in the Christmas play at church this past year. He worked so hard to learn his lines and spent many hours at practices. He did AMAZING! That was definitely a proud tearful mommy moment! It gave me chills and teary eyes watching him do that and knowing that God so graciously gifted that wonderful boy to me!! I just kept thinking, that's my boy! He belongs to me! He's still rocking along with piano and enjoying it very much! He had a recital in December that Analeigh and I were able to sneak in and hear him play from the back and then head back home. He did so well and has also played a couple times at church over the past few months! He is currently preparing pieces for the Aiken Festival of Music and looking forward to that! :) It's so fun listening to him progress and watching him learn and prepare pieces for church and lessons. Going way back, he also completed his first season of football! He showed up to every practice with a hardworking attitude and willing spirit. He learned a ton this year about football and is hoping to play next year as well. He's doing very well in school and making us very proud!

Ada is still hard at work on gymnastics. She puts her type A, hardworking, highly motivated personality to good use every week. She took on the challenge of moving on to level 3 and has accepted it with such grace and worked so hard at it. She loves competing and putting on a show, never shows a bit of nerves while she's out there! She also accepted a pretty big singing part of the Christmas play at church this past year, and I was told she "was leading the choir". It's so fun to watch her shine her little light! She still busy loving everyone and finding friends wherever she goes!

Grady is taking on being 4 like a champ! He's learning to write his letters and numbers. He played soccer for the first time and LOVED it! He scored 3 goals his first game! He's accepted his role as a big bother with such confidence and sureness. He will definitely be her buddy! Four is an age of responsibility development, learning to channel excess energy positively and learning to show a bit of self control. Some days are hard and some he's constantly reminding himself to use his manners and obey like a big boy. He's definitely a loving little one, has an eye for detail, and loves the outdoors! We are proud watching him grow into his own.

May I Never Forget

As I hold my sleeping baby on my chest, I realize the middle of the night feedings are beginning to phase out and she's sleeping more through the night. I can't help but think, while we sit in church, this is the last little one I will hold and sway to the hymns being sung and walk around with during the sermon. It's impossible to do anything without realizing this is the last time. I'm scared to blink! I know if I do, she will be 5 and the others will be so grown! There really are times I wish everything could stay just as it is now. Small children who want to be with me, who need me, and who fill my home and heart with the best laughs, hugs and love. I want them to keep pushing me to be better, dig deeper, and try new things. The reality is, they will grow, they won't want me as much or need me as much, but I pray we will always, no matter how big they get, make each other better, dig deeper and try new things. I hope we talk every single day, just as we do now. I anticipate with great joy what the future holds for these four amazing people, but the selfish part of me sometimes wishes I could keep them forever, but since I cant, I pray I never ever forget. All of this! May I never ever forget.

I hope I never forget the passion my big boy has for creating with his legos, technology, and outdoor play. The beauty with which he plays music, his outgoing personality and his kind heart. May I never forget the sound of my baby boy coming in and asking if he could sleep in my bed "just for a tiny minute", his rare but overwhelmingly sweet physical display of love he will occasionally share, and the pride he shows as he's beginning to learn to write and his desire to "read words". And my girls! May I never forget watching this absolutely adorable sister bond form. My oldest girl has an inner light bright enough to light up the night sky. May I never forget her passion for loving others, reading books, and telling jokes! (They rarely make sense, but it's so fun!) Her self determination, love of art and babydolls. And my tiny girl...oh my sweetness. I want to remember it all! Her first laugh! Her bright smile! I can only imagine what a lovely girl she will grow up to be!

The days are chaotic and rushed sometimes. There's so much to do and get done in the few hours each day has. And with four children, craziness is always around, but in the  midst of it, I never tire of looking at these beautiful faces. They are a true reflection of God's love and grace and may I never ever forget. These, by far, are the best days of my life.

Time Changes Things

So we started the parenting thing at the ripe old age of 23! 23 used to sound so old to us! 9 years ago we started a journey that has impacted each and every part of our lives in the most amazing and yet challenging ways! And after having 3 little ones between the age of 23 and 27, we now welcomed our last at 32, it's a little different than I remember. You may not think those few years change things much but boy do they! We have learned that for sure! It all felt new all over again! And all that I thought I had figured out, my baby girl did the opposite! And she's still doing that! Physically we are older and have generally more responsibility so naturally a bit more exhausted! Our family has moved away since our third baby was born so that's definitely different this go round! No one to call in for emergency relief or quick date night. Haha! All of our friends are older now too and have older children now so they stay busy! Not quite like when you all were having babies together! Most of my friends are done with that part of their life now (as are we! Ha) and have such busy lives so that's definitely been different this time around. The recovery in your 30s with 4 kids is a bit slower than I remember. But there's also some good in that. It's allowed me to just soak her up! Every detail! And it's allowed the big kids to really enjoy this new experience and grow from it! We have yet to tackle too much outside of the daily grind..just started attending church and going out in public with all the children. And being the old lady I am (wink!), I know there's plenty of time for that later, so I'm just not rushing into it! And I  just haven't been ready to share her too much yet! 

We are 9 weeks out now, so stamina is returning and I'm able to get back to exercise and running, which is awesome! Our family loves to spend time doing these things together. We are slowly (sort of!) finding a routine...however, not quite there yet! I feel like though, we are finally taking that deep cleansing breath and smiling, realizing we made it! We made it through another pregnancy, birth, and brand new little one and we are beginning to get used to our new little family dynamics! We made it! Even being 9 years older than the first time and 4.5 years older than the last! Different now, yes! But we made it. ;) It's a good feeling and now we can begin to explore and grow and learn together and find our new normal! Everyone is getting used to her and she is getting used to us! I'm getting better at telling people I have four children and not looking as surprised/overwhelmed about that as they do. Ha! I'm really loving this momming with my big helpers! It's a pleasure and so fun to teach them about caring for her and letting them participate. So let the fun begin! Happy, fun, exciting times lie ahead! 30's are good! ;) 

So here they are! 9 years of hard work here!

 

Cathing Up

So, we are 9 weeks out of welcoming our last little one and things are beginning to feel normalish again! I'm going to play catch up while there's only one kid here and the others are at church for a bit! I have written several posts over the last couple months but didn't have time to add pictures and proof read, so now I'm just going to catch up and post them all at once! ;)

The First Christmas

This Christmas was a special one! They all are, but this one was unusually so! We were celebrating our first Christmas in our new home and Analeigh's first Christmas too! We enjoyed (as much as possible with a newborn) all the fun things that the season brings...Advent, elves, Santa, cookies, good deeds, Jesus and Fun! The big kids were a big part of the Christmas program at church and that was a delight to watch! (more from that later!). It was a wonderful time spent enjoying our new baby and family!

New Year and Adventure Awaits

Adventure Awaits What a year it's been! And what an exciting year ahead! 2016 included many unforeseen changes and opportunities. All of which have been exciting and beautiful and we are so grateful for another amazing year with our little family! As the year ends we find ourselves in a new home, another member strong, and another year older. 

2017 has rolled in and we are excited and looking very much forward to the adventure that awaits! Watching the baby of the family grow and change so fast as babies do in their first year, celebrating birthdays, holidays and ordinary days in our new home, completing third and first grade and moving on to the next, and family trips! It's all filled with amazing opportunity and busting at the seams with love! This past year involved an incredible amount of simplifying...work load, home, "stuff", and activities. It's taught us so much and we start this year with a totally different perspective, joy and anticipation of what's to come! We are so unbelievably grateful and blessed to live the life we do and we can't wait to see what's waiting right around the corner for us and our family! So, here's to you, 2017! Thank you Lord for the blessings of this past year and of the year to come! God is so good! <3

This covers Christmas and New Years, I have a few more to catch up on and then I'll be back in present time! ;)